Book Review: "The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake"

This was last month's book club selection, and I just realized I never wrote my summary. (I know y'all were on the edges of your seats for it. Ha!)

Here it is: This book is stupid.

A little girl, Rose, if I remember correctly, discovers that she has the ability to taste in food the emotions of the person who created it. This is sort of "Like Water for Chocolate"-esque. Rose learns about her mother's unhappiness and affair by eating her food. She can pinpoint where any mass-produced item is from, down to the exact factory. She can break down recipes and tell exactly where each ingredient is from.

Rose doesn't have super close friends and isn't that close to her family, either. As she grows up, she and her dad have a chance to bond more. Her brother is a lost cause. He's a genius, but basically lives like a hermit. He'll vanish for a few weeks at a time, only to reappear completely emaciated and in need of hospital care to get back to health.

Long story short: Rose discovers that her grandfather had a "gift" of smelling the emotions of people, and it damn near drove him crazy. He ended up wearing this weird mask thing in order to keep it under control. Her father has a similar thing regarding hospitals. He's scared to death to go in one because of the reaction he has to it.

So in the end we find out her brother, the genius, has found a way to break the laws of physics and turn himself into furniture. Yes, you read that right. He. Becomes. Furniture. When he's missing it's not because he's on a drug binge, or locked in a den of hookers or in a drunken stupor under a bridge somewhere. It's because he's the coat rack.

It's the stupidest thing I've ever read in my life. I am so so SO glad I checked out the book from the library and didn't actually buy it. I would have been PISSED if I'd spent money on it. The only good thing about it, in fact, was that our book club hostess was inspired to make a lemon cake from scratch as our dessert. I think we all deserved a slice after the nonsense that is this book.